If I Give Up My Baby For Adoption, What Will I Feel Years From Now?

What I tell all expectant moms, is that if you make any life decision based upon solid reasons, those reasons will bring comfort when you question your decision. However, even the best, most rational, well-thought-out decision can also cause sadness. Most certainly, every woman who has ever placed a baby for adoption second guesses themselves and experiences feelings of grief and sadness. Certainly, a woman who does not give up (or more correctly, make an adoption plan for) her child will not suffer the grief and sadness that goes along with parting with her child.  But, if handled correctly, the grief associated with placing a baby for adoption subsides. Like losing a close friend or relative to death, one does not forget the lost friend or relative, but the acute pain lessens over time. Many adoption counselors would say the same about the feelings of loss associated with adoption.

However, a woman who does not proceed with an adoption plan, does not assure herself of a lifetime of happiness as a parent. Parenting is hard in the best of circumstances. Parenting without long term support and resources (not just money) can cause a lifetime of grief and sadness. Watching a child grow up knowing that you are not providing your child with opportunities that will allow him or her to reach their potential in life can create feelings of guilt and intense sadness that do not diminish with time.

If you wonder if emotionally, financial, and otherwise you are ready to parent your soon-to-be-born baby, you should look into adoption with a reputable adoption agency or an experienced adoption attorney. Under Indiana law and the laws of most states, you cannot legally commit to an adoption before the baby is born, even if you want to.

We at Kirsh & Kirsh, P.C. (“Kirsh & Kirsh”), have talked to many expectant and birth mothers considering adoption. Frankly, many of the women with whom we speak, and even meet in person, decide not to proceed with an adoption plan. That’s completely fine. We never pressure a birth mother to choose adoption. We will provide you information about the adoption process and give you profiles of waiting families if you would like. We will treat you with kindness and respect. We will arrange for you to speak with a counselor and your own attorney, if you wish, at NO COST to you. At least then, you can make a better-informed decision – and most importantly, a decision you can live with.

You may contact us at Kirsh & Kirsh without cost or obligation on your part. Birth mothers NEVER pay a fee to Kirsh & Kirsh. See what we have to offer before making the most important decision of your life. You can call, text and or email us anytime. We answer our office phone, 317-575-5555, 24/7/365. We also promptly respond to text messages at 317-721-2030 and email at AdoptionSupport@kirsh.com. We try to respond to emails and text messages within minutes of receipt.